trend watch

see if you can spot the trend in these stories:

Man Punches Bus Driver for Staring at His Wife

Waterloo Teen Taken into Custody for Stabbing

Man Killed One Woman, Wounded Another, Before Shooting Self


survey says....?

if you said 'violence is primarily perpetrated by men', you would be right!!!



ugh. i want to move to iceland.

you take the good, you take the bad...the facts of life?

the good: Girlafesto! the coolest thing i've seen in a LONG time. i'm going to print it out for my nieces' bedroom walls!


the bad: the reality of life for women and girls. this particular story is from iraqi kurdistan, and is actually really beautiful and inspirational- but it only highlights the DAILY fight for equality women face, everywhere. (via the awesome thefbomb.org )


the facts of life: violence against women harms men too, and men have a vitally important role to play in ending it. A Brother's Story is a great insight into the perspective of one man fighting against intimate partner violence. (via http://www.vday.org/)

smart girls are scary, cont.

as school started over the last few days, i've heard a lot of complaining from students about having to go back, leaving carefree summers behind, and especially, new school uniform codes (shudder). all relatively normal, understandable, even expected complaints from american kids.

the gratitude we should all feel for the fact that our students can attend school free (generally) from fear or danger is easily forgotten.

40 afghan school girls were apparently poisoned in a gas attack as they sat in school this week.

and previously in may.

and april.

and last year.

always girls schools.

but they keep going to school, believing fervently in the value of education, their right to knowledge.

they are braver than i will ever be.

what is going ON?

haven't had much time to post lately, but i just have to say: W.T.H. IS GOING ON??

(trigger warning)
how many of these rape/incest/imprisonment stories to we have to keep hearing?

seriously.

the next time i hear someone say that women have achieved equality, or that rape culture is a myth...i might just flip right out on their willfully ignorant a**.

i can't say it better than my favorite spinster aunt:
"...a world order predicated on domination'n'submission oppresses entire classes of people. That oppression is experienced by these classes of people as discrimination, violence and hatred. That discrimination, violence and hatred are unhealthy and injurious."

which classes of people, one might ask? female people, brown people, differently-abled people, young people, old people, gay people, mentally-challenged people, poor people, and generally, anyone non-male, non-white, non-rich and non-NORM.

i hate the norm. viva la diferencia.

but i digress. those stories above hail from brazil, germany, and the US.
guess what... i'd put money on similar situations happening right now in dozens of other countries all over the world. because women are treated like property. it's really that simple. the worldwide oppression of women pervades all cultures, all religions, all national boundaries.

wake up, people. the war is far from over. as long as girls are being kidnapped, held against their will, raped by their fathers and forced to bear their children... we sure as h-e-double-hockey-sticks aren't equal.

cheers & jeers: des moines version

first, the good news: des moines' own Drake University invited Shira Tarrant, from California State University, Long Beach, to speak on campus yesterday about sexual assault and how it shouldn't be up to women to prevent their own assaults (well, isn't that a radical idea!). Best quote:

"A lot of the conversation is that women should walk in groups and wear a whistle," she said. "Well, maybe men should wear a whistle and if they think they're going to rape somebody, they should blow it so people can stay away from them."

Kudos to Drake, for taking a proactive and (sadly) progressive step toward raising awareness about sexual assault & violence against women. the question is: what's the next step?

THIS is the kind of thing i want Iowa to be known for.

--

now for the bad news: Dave Leach, a Des Moines anti-abortion activist and confidant to the man convicted earlier this year of murdering a Kansas abortion provider, will be the Republican candidate for state Senate in district 31.

this guy is freaky. really domestic-terrorism-kind of freaky.

Since the conviction [of Roeder], Leach has kept in constant contact with Roeder, eventually releasing to the media a 10-minute interview he conducted with Roeder where he said he had no regrets for what he had done and little sympathy for the family of his victim.

this is NOT the kind of thing i want Iowa to be known for.

i can't participate in this particular election (not my district)- but if you live in Des Moines District 31- vote for Matt McCoy! keep this murder-apologist Leach out of office!

scream-worthy

here's what's making me want to scream today:

Fat Hatred
it's insidious "because being fat is viewed not only as a flaw, but as a flaw by choice, a moral failing due to weakness of character." (via Shakesville)

love this last line- so maddeningly true, for so many women:

There is not "a thin person" inside of me screaming to get out. There is only me, screaming for my right to exist in the body I have.

--

Prude? (warning- graphic descriptions of sex in the linked article)
objectification. so old news, isn't it? women are objectified every day, in every medium. great blog post from Ms. Magazine about the effects of that omnipresent objectification. but my question is- so how to we really stop it? really?

the answer i'm coming up with more and more often is: women need to make more MONEY. feminists need to acquire wealth. instead of making feminism our life's work, we need to make money like everyone else, and then we can use it to advance our feminist ideals. but without the power that comes with having serious capital, how will we, for example, have any effect on the development, production and marketing of movies and tv shows that objectify us? really? how will we?

--

Afghan women fear loss of hard-won progress
what the author of this article in the Washington Post really means to say, i think, is that Afghan women fear what women all over the world fear (and in particular, what u.s. women rightfully fear this week as well, as health care purportedly comes up for a "final" vote): BEING THROWN UNDER THE BUS.

forgive us if we find it hard to swallow when men in positions of power and leadership say, "trust us, we have your best interest in mind."

--

After 13 years, police still hunting for East Coast Rapist
hunted like animals; women are victims of men's violence every day. how is it possible that rape is still tolerated in this country. that rapists are not convicted for the predatory criminals that they are, and in fact, rape kits are put on a shelf and never even tested for DNA?

how.
is.
this.
possible?
unless there is a real and systematic repression of women going on? women's voices, women's abuses, and women's lives are silenced, covered up (unless they are deemed "sexy"), and ignored. it's real. and every woman in america is affected by it.

--

How We're Doing: Women and Wealth
this is staggering. literally staggering. Ms. Magazine brings light to the recent study by the Insight Center for Community Economic Development, also highlighted in the Pittsburg Post-Gazette, which reveals:

1. single white women (between the ages of 36-49) make only 61% as much as white men on average. that 61% works out to a median wealth of about $42,600. (and wealth = all owned assets)

chew on that for a minute. lily ledbetter knows what i'm talking about.
next,

2. single black women (of the same age) have a median wealth of $5.
you didn't read that incorrectly. 1,2,3,4,5.

$5.

now either EVERY single black woman between 36-49 is ____(fill in the blank with the disgusting stereotypes of welfare-abusing/drug-abusing/lazy/stupid/makesmewanttothrowup)...

OR

maybe, just maybe, there are system-level inequalities that contribute to this sickening gap in wealth & self-sufficiency. for instance: as a white woman who was raised in a two-parent home, it was just sort of expected that i would attend college. (it was NOT expected that my parents would pay for it.) so i worked 3 jobs and applied for scholarships and made it through.

but what if i hadn't come from a 2-parent household? what if neither of my parents had college educations? what if i couldn't find work on the radio (which i did) because my voice sounded "too black"? what if no one told me about the opportunities to test out of entry-level courses, which enabled me to graduate early and accumulate less debt?

The U.S. has a long history of policies that transferred wealth from people of
color to whites [...]As examples, the Indian Removal Act of 1830 forcibly
removed Cherokees from their traditional lands to make room for white settlers.
Jim Crow laws kept African Americans out of better paying jobs, quality public
education and business opportunities. The benefits of citizenship, open to
Europeans, was forbidden to Asian immigrants. The exclusion of Social Security
coverage for a whole generation of farm workers, laborers and domestic workers,
kept Latino and black elders in poverty. Advantage and disadvantage is passed
from generation to generation, often with a cumulative effect, thereby
contributing to the current racial wealth gap.

it isn't a myth. race matters, especially to women. to women's lives.

so, what makes YOU want to scream today?

violence = violence

anyone who knows me would (hopefully) tell you that i care about cultural sensitivity and that i respect and admire differences in culture, religion, background, etc.

what i do not respect is the way some people (not any particular culture as a whole, or religion...but people who care more about power and dominion than their fellow human being) use their culture or religion as an excuse to perpetrate violence against women and girls.

this is a great blog post from Madre, an incredible organization dedicated to fighting violence against women, creating financial equality and building peace. their blog highlights all kinds of amazing efforts, and the one they link to in this blog post, the Global Campaign to Stop Killing and Stoning Women looks like something i'd admire too- so straightforward and truthful. violence against women cannot be hidden behind the veil of religion, culture or tradition.

violence is ALWAYS violence. it's never right.

refusing to be ignored

wow.

what a powerful essay by Mona Eltahawy, about the horror of, and real reason behind, the practice of female genital mutilation.

"[The] analogy of penis chopping was absurd not just because if boys were being
mutilated the world would not be so silent but because, really, who would want
to control male sexuality? We invent little blue pills to boost it."

like so many other practices which are ingrained, entrenched and generally accepted, FGM is about so much more than the actual physical act. it's about power and control.

as is rape.
as is the wage gap.
as are standards of beauty.

and all this manipulation, subjugation, and control over women is everywhere.

no really. EVERYWHERE.

"Prevalent mostly in Africa, the Middle East and parts of Asia, FGM is no
longer a traditional practice that harms girls just "over there". As a result of
immigration and refugee movements, FGM is now being practiced in the U.S.
Canada, Europe, Australia and New Zealand."

it is NOT just "over there" that women are cut.
it is NOT just "over there" that raped women are murdered because they bring shame to their husband or father's family.
it is NOT just "over there" that women and girls are kept from reaching their full potential by lack of education, resource and the simple encouragement to try, while boys not only receive all those things, but are expected to be successful socially, financially and sexually.

these symptoms of sexism harm women AND men. girls AND boys.

what if human beings could find a way to treat one another as equally valued, of equal worth and dignity...? wow, indeed.

for now, i applaud Mona Eltahawy and women like her who are refusing to be ignored.

"the destruction of the female species"

as usual, eve ensler has hit it out of the park with her piece on huffpo from last week.

the women of the congo still live in fear every day.

Over twelve years, this war, this brutally inconceivable violence has raged on.
Almost six million dead. Almost 500 thousand raped. You tell the story of horror
and atrocity one too many times and then you realize nothing is changing and
that the world goes on getting its minerals, supporting its luxuries and the
death, massacres rapes and tortures of millions do not matter. And then you
can't find a real reason for wanting to live in humanity or be part of this
world but you don't want to kill yourself so you start screaming out, screaming
and screaming out and then you get called intense, angry and then mad. Because
that is what people who have crossed over get called.

At what point are we all going to cross over?

let's try this- instead of these women's names sounding unfamiliar and their location seeming remote, why don't we substitute our own names and hometowns? really. read that article again, and insert your name.

Mwamirindi/Carolynn was held as a sex slave and pieces of her flesh were cut every
few days. She was raped for months and watched them rape her sister in law who
they killed and cut open and served for dinner and then when Mwamirindi/Carolynn finally escaped and returned home, she was expelled by her husband who sold her land and house and threw her and her children into the street. Now she is three months pregnant with a baby from the rapes.

terrifying, isn't it? but it is REALITY for these women.

eve calls the situation there "the destruction of the female species of the Congo".

how can it be anything else?

---

in related news, evidence is piling up that the recession is indeed sparking an increase in violence against women and children domestically. BIG surprise there.

support V-day, support your local women's shelter, support your lawmakers who DO SOMETHING to stop gender-based violence (and ask those who don't if they consider their mothers, sisters, daughters and wives just collateral damage?)

more than half our population is at risk.

Women Unbound!

well this is cool!

Women Unbound reading challenge, recommended to me by my sister, (who, by the way, blogs at As Usual, I Need More Bookshelves. Check her out!)

hmm...i've never posted any book reviews, but this feminist reading challenge is perfect for me, because i can join the challenge at a lower level of commitment ("Philogynist: read at least two books, including at least one nonfiction one.") to just dip my toes in. :)

so i suppose i should pick a couple of books...i might have to cheat and choose from my sister's list (she is, after all, my personal librarian- i don't even bother picking books on my own any more!) ok, the two books i will ready by November 30, 2010 are:

Fiction: The Robber Bride, Margaret Atwood
(yay! my sister had this on her list, which reminded me that i actually already have this book!)

Non-Fiction: ???
i confess, i don't read as much non-fiction as i'd like. (well, i don't read as much as i'd like PERIOD, but particularly not non-fiction.) but i think i've got something at home i can commit to reading...just need to choose. my non-fiction choice is TBA.

ETA: I'm going to choose from these three, apparently thematic, non-fiction choices:

Dance of the Dissident Daughter, Sue Monk Kidd

When God was a Woman, Merlin Stone

Out of the Garden: Women Writers on the Bible, ed. Christina Buchmann & Celina Spiegel

also, here's the Women Unbound meme to get us started:

1. What does feminism mean to you? Does it have to do with the work sphere? The social sphere? How you dress? How you act?
feminism, to me, is best summed up by the deceptively simple quotation "...feminism is the radical notion that women are people"
although i would probably add one clarification: feminism is the radical notion that women are people who are of equal value, worth and deserving of rights as male people.
doesn't that sound logical? reasonable? and yet it is still undeniably revolutionary.
this applies in every sphere, because in every sphere, women are treated unequally.

2. Do you consider yourself a feminist? Why or why not?
yes, yes, a thousand times YES.

3. What do you consider the biggest obstacle women face in the world today? Has that obstacle changed over time, or does it basically remain the same?
i personally believe violence against women is (should be) the most pressing issue for feminists. the gendercide (literally) of women across the globe is a direct result of the worldwide and historic de-valuing of women as people. when women are not considered to be equal in worth to men, they are abused. they are by default considered to be automatic prey, and unworthy of equal protections, rights and/or dignities. this doesn't happen just to poor women, or uneducated women, or bad women, or good women, or white women or black women or asian women, or straight women, or women who 'should know better' or women who 'asked for it' or to victims. it happens to every woman.

our very culture de-values women on a daily basis, as do cultures around the world.
male = normal and female = not (less than) male.

the more women and men who
1. live by example and treat women with equal respect and dignity every day, and who
2. speak out and stand up against violence against women in every form (verbal, physical, sexual, psychological, overt, covert, institutionalized, racial, religious, educational, professional, personal), and who
3. teach children that women do have equal worth, and sexism, violence against women and inequality are unnaccepatable...

the more quickly change will come.

thanks Eli!!!

brain food

two totally unrelated, but thought-provoking pieces i read today:

Single in the City: perspective from a single woman in urban India.
"The idea that the single woman is entitled to the full range of freedoms that any other adult does and is entitled to live her life as she chooses is also one that is yet to gain full acceptance in our society."

(lest you think that women actually have equal rights.)

and Remember the Women? about the realities facing afghani women. it's long, but completely eye-opening. i recommend reading the whole thing, and putting yourself in the shoes of an afghan woman.
"The current reality is that...women are denied their most fundamental human rights and risk further violence in the course of seeking justice for crimes perpetrated against them." For women, "human rights are values, standards, and entitlements that exist only in theory and at times, not even on paper."

(lest you think we are accomplishing any lofty goals in our 'war of necessity')

weapon du jour

in the west-african country of Guinea last week, an unarmed crowd of political protestors numbering about 50,000 was fired upon and violently disbanded by governmental military forces. depending on the source, between 50 and 150 people were killed.

"Cellphone snapshots, ugly and hard to refute, are circulating here and feeding rage: they show that women were the particular targets of the Guinean soldiers..."

particular attention was paid to dehumanizing and violating women during the clash. witnesses state that at least 6-10 women were beaten, gang-raped and/or brutally attacked (whipped, stabbed, clubbed).

this strategy, of course, is not new. secretary of state hillary clinton addressed the UN Security Council last week and the council passed a resolution condemning rape as a weapon of war.

but what is going to be done to halt the use of this weapon? will there be any funding to back up the UN's resolution? with more than 200,000 women raped in the congo alone, frankly, this weapon is proving to be more dangerous to the world's population than nuclear weapons have been to date. why isn't there a UN sanctioned and funded watchdog group like the IAEA going into wartorn countries and calling international attention to the atrocities being committed against women every day? putting pressure on world powers to bring economic and social powers to bear against countries that allow this weapon to be used freely? reducing the proliferation of this deadly weapon across the globe, just as nuclear arms proliferation is carefully controlled?

rape is epidemic, systemic and, as research clearly shows, completely destructive to the fabric of a community.

"Community leaders noted that the frequent and extreme brutality committed with impunity during wave after wave of armed occupation has resulted in the disintegration of the moral and social fabric in many localities. Social stigma has left large numbers of rape victims and children born of rape rejected by their families and communities. Many cases of HIV and other infections remain untested and untreated. Fear of going to fields and markets--sites where rapes often take place--has resulted in spiraling malnutrition and economic loss. Widespread criminal impunity and inadequate local and regional governance leave communities without the means to reduce the violence."

communities are wiped out by rape as weapon of war, just as surely as they would be by weapons of mass destruction. in fact, rape SHOULD be considered a WMD. it clearly creates mass casualties in its wake; but to date, rape has not been a priority on the worldwide security agenda.

(i'll give you one guess who's in the majority at the highest levels of world leadership/governance?)

danger: woman ahead.

"one of the biggest dangers is to be a woman."

that particular sentence is in reference to afghanistan, but truly, it could be said of nearly every country around the globe.

for the sake of illustration however, afghanistan is the example du jour.

"Afghanistan is a country where for centuries women have been considered property -- not equals, like the constitution states. They are often beaten, raped and even sold to the highest bidder."

"Nearly 90 percent of Afghan women suffer from domestic abuse, according to the United Nations Development Fund for Women. Despite that, there are less than a dozen shelters...in Afghanistan."

"In Afghanistan, a woman is blamed for the injustices she must live through."


if this happens to one woman, we all suffer.
it actually happens to millions of women every day. imagine the consequences.

reminder: the world does not consider you to be human.

i mean, if you (female reader) were considered human, your life and rights would be treated as sanctimoniously as the purported "life" which exists between two blobs of cells from the moment they touch. personhood? what about the personhood of WOMEN? living, breathing, (voting) women.

also, if you were considered human by the world at large, we wouldn't be reading another story about a woman kept prisoner for decades, raped as a matter of course, forced to bear her rapists multiple spawn, and fear for her life if she so much as thought about seeking help. this woman wasn't considered human. she was considered property. and although we've heard 3 stories like this now in the past year (Fritzl in Austria, Garrido in California, and now this Australian case), i realize it's still extreme.

what isn't extreme is the similaries between the way these women were treated and the way that women all over the world are treated every day! rape, psychological and physical torture, control over mind and body, imprisonment, threats of violence if help is sought...

every day. everywhere. we are attacked, from every angle.

it's not acceptable. we are human, and we deserve equal rights. period. full stop.

CNN= completely negative news (for women)

cnn headlines today:

california man murders his ex-wife, "removes" her teeth and fingers, and stuffs her body in a suitcase. (motive? none.)

florida man bludgeons wife in the head with a hammer while she's sleeping, next door to where their 6 month old son is sleeping, with man's parents downstairs. (motive? none.)

and then there's the afghan vote yesterday. in which many women didn't even know they had the right to participate. and those who did feared for their lives.

not a great week to be a woman, no matter where you live. (but sure, we've come a long way baby. *gag*)

just like that time...

this reminds me of that story i heard about a woman kidnapping her husband, and holding him prisoner during a violent stand-off with police...

oh wait.

no it doesn't. because i don't think i've ever heard that story. just this one.

the good news is, she got out alive. note, however, that her ex-husband has other pending criminal charges, including threatening, violating a protective order, arson and forgery. she's been dealing with this threat, this fear, for years. this story is what you would find in the dictionary under 'broken system'.

x Infinity

i just don't understand (and yet, i do) how stories like this don't cause people to absolutely riot in the streets.

"She was 23 the day in 1994 he beat her senseless, leaving her with back, neck and hand injuries — bone spurs, pinched nerves, osteoarthritis — that still require surgeries. He told Thompson he would kill her, bury her in the back yard and tell their daughters she had run away. He slapped her so hard that a ring on his right hand flew off and dented the wall.The abuse continued for more than three hours. At his trial, she testified the pain was so severe when he squeezed her ears with pliers that she pleaded for him to kill her. Instead, he held her at gunpoint for another 15 hours before allowing her to go to a hospital.
On Friday he was released [from prison], and she began waiting for him to make good on his promise to kill her and her daughters. Price walked out of a federal prison in South Carolina after serving 4½ years of a five-year sentence for sending the [death threat] letter, which began with the words, "Dear Slut."

and stories like this could be told in a hundred newspapers across the country every day (and thousands around the world, especially in areas where women have no legal protections whatsoever). will there ever be a time when women don't live in fear of abuse?

survival

Patti Rosenfelder survived rape and sexual assault 30 years ago, and wants to tell her story. I think it's a story everyone should hear.

Lolita Windsor's son stabbed her repeatedly and held her captive, over a period of hours.

Darfuri women live in fear, even after they have fled their war-ravaged homeland in Sudan. The refugee camps are almost as bad as the conflict zone, where a simple trip to gather firewood often results in attack and rape.

Darfur. The Congo. The United States of America.
Not so very different from one another, for women.
We live under the constant threat of violence, rape and the knowledge that domestic violence and sexual assault are stopped or punished in only a fraction of the cases. The war on women is real, and every woman who has ever walked across a parking lot holding her keys the way Patti Rosenfelder does knows it.

the rape of a nation

nation of women, that is. today, and every day.

¹ep·i·dem·ic

Pronunciation:

\ˌe-pə-ˈde-mik\

Function:

adjective

Etymology:

French épidémique, from Middle French, from epidemie, noun, epidemic, from Late Latin epidemia, from Greekepidēmia visit, epidemic, from epidēmos visiting, epidemic, from epi- + dēmos people — more at demagogue

Date:

1603

1: affecting or tending to affect a disproportionately large number of individuals within a population, community, or region at the same time epidemic>

two parents sexually abuse & rape adopted daughter, separately and unbeknownst to one another.

rape is used worldwide as a weapon of war. i know that's a cliche by know- but imagine being born (through no fault of your own) as a newborn baby girl...in the congo. not so cliche now.

rape isn't enough- this guy decided to beat her in the head with a HAMMER as well.

14- year- old girl raped. there are no other details really...there don't need to be. this girls life is changed forever.

an army sergeant forced a women into his car and raped her in front of a restaurant in bel air. she tried to bang on the window, but no one heard. this we'll defend?

not just rape- rape of a THIRTEEN year old, MENTALLY HANDICAPPED girl...ON TAPE. but women aren't systematically abused. just individually abused- over and over and over.

child rape is the trifecta today- 14, 13, and now 10.

former minister. rape of four prostitutes. at knife-point. a butcher knife.

false rape allegations. yikes- definitely not good. murder, however- ALSO not really a good option. and he didn't just murder his girlfriend (the accuser), but also her sister. he stabbed his girlfriend in the back, and her sister, "Sabrina was stabbed 35 times, but Mr Ali said he only remembered stabbing her twice."

here's the thing. it doesn't matter what you do. take back the night. a vagina monologue. donate to a women's foundation. mentor a young man and teach him that violence against women is unacceptable. volunteer for a rape crisis line.

do SOMETHING. do it. NOW. women are being raped, every minute.

Final score: marching band 2, thugs 0.

one of the lucky ones:

Girl beats off muggers with marching band baton. 'Moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls,' official says.

The real moral is- ALWAYS fight back.